This post isn’t so much about the actions of an irreverent Facebooker as it is about thanking a Facebook friend for nipping an icky situation in the bud. Although I’m quite the pollyanna when it comes to netiquette, I do realize that there’s a lot of immature and meanie behavior out there. Being a peaceful sort, I usually shy away from confrontation and raisin’ a ruckus, so I’ve pretty much stayed under the online radar, which is why I was surprised recently by the unprovoked insolence of a Facebook friend’s friend.
First, a little about my Facebook “friend”…I’ve never met this 20-something guy, but was, eons ago, close with his father. I imagine that, to the poor kid’s dismay, he was convinced to friend me so his dad could have a peephole into my life. That’s fine. If he happens to see anything of interest here, I do hope he shares!
So, his kid, my virtual friend, recently posted an article on the BP spill…lots of conflicting data about the actual amount of oil being spilled into the ocean each day. It was a good article, so I used the “like” button. Then, one of his friends posted a comment directed at me, and what it lacked in humor, it made up for in meanness, and it was even kinda embarrassing…something to the effect that if I “liked” that then I was, in his words, “retarded,” and he hoped the spill’s repercussions would some day rise up, walk land and wreak havoc on my person…and that’s putting it delicately. This guy doesn’t know me at all, and his rant on me wasn’t even on point. So, thanks go out to my Facebook friend whom, remember, I don’t even know, but who deleted his friend’s wacked comment and let me know in so many words that I needn’t worry about it happening again. He may’ve done it out of respect for his dad or just because he’s that kinda guy, but no matter, I’m grateful to him for removing it. There’s enough ugliness out there.
I understand wisecracking and being obnoxious with friends, as I’m definitely not above any of that stuff, but what’s the point of dissing a complete stranger? I really think he thought he was funny, but believe me, he was no comedian. Age doesn’t necessarily immunize folks from being rude, but here’s hoping that this guy grows out of it.
Grace
T
8noodles
Anita
justin
YogaforCynics
Ahh … Facebook. I hope I’m never tempted to join such a thing.
It’s good that the comment was removed but, despite the hope that age will eventually turn him into something along the lines of a likable person, some people never change.
Omar Modesto´s last blog post ..Numbers
Hi Omar (Friday13, right?). Yeah, Facebook can be a time-waster if you don’t watch it. If he had let the comment stand, that’d be okay, ’cause I did respond to the guy, but I would be reluctant to interact with the FB friend again.
And yeah, some people never change.
Twitter: plasmanc
Hi Holly,
I’m on Facebook, as myself rather than my alter-ego “The Plastic Mancunian”, but I rarely use the thing. I think its a little pointless to be honest and only joined because Mrs PM persuaded me to. Few of my closest friends (my age) are on it, citing it as a “young persons thing” – thanks pals!! :-)
I think it is easy also to be a “keyboard warrior” and hurl abuse at strangers – I’ve suffered abuse once on my blog when I read that a Russian despised what I’d said about Hugh Laurie (this person like “House” and couldn’t take the fact that I regard him as a comedic actor).
Also on a message board for my favourite football (soccer) team, I have had varying degrees of abuse about my opinions (I am much more belligerent in driving home my opinions on there to be fair).
However, I try to find humour if such a thing happens to me and make a joke of it. I simply can’t take this kind of thing seriously. In your case, it looks as if the muppet in question simply misunderstood why you liked the article and hurled abuse, which is easy for him because he doesn’t know you and won’t suffer repercussions from you directly – a classic keyboard warrior.
A subject for a future blog post from me I think – you’ve inspired me, Holly.
:-)
Cheers
PM
Plastic Mancunian´s last blog post ..Ronnie James Dio – Rest In Peace
Hi PM. I’ve found almost all of my childhood friends on Facebook and even a few relatives whom I haven’t been in contact with for years, so I’ve enjoyed seeing what everyone’s been up to. I think in this case I wandered out of my comfort zone of middle-aged and older folks whom I know, into a younger environment of strangers…completely different worlds. I’ve seen the younger bunch rag on each other in comments, which is sometimes kinda entertaining, but I didn’t expect that anyone would respond to something I wrote, at least in the way they did.
Ha! I remember the Russian guy. Kinda like my intimidator, he didn’t know what he was talking about, but had a lot to say nonetheless.
And I’m glad I could lend some inspiration!
Hey, that’s not the way I remember that song going, but your version is kinda catchy. (LOL?)
In all seriousness, I have been made acutely aware of overall interaction between people becoming more and more mean-spirited. Granted, it may very well be that this is just on account of this world becoming smaller and smaller via social media technologies, but far too many just plain don’t give a rip if they hurt someone’s feelings or not, nor if what they are saying is true or not.
As in regards to Facebook, I just joined a couple of months ago, and I absolutely love it–especially in comparison to MySpace. I have not done a whole lot of “interacting” there yet, however.
FishHawk´s last blog post ..WhiteHeart Wednesday
Hi FishHawk. Yeah, as they say on “American Idol,” I thought I’d make the song my own (ha!), and I thought it was catchy, too.
I’ve noticed within comments (anywhere on the internet, actually) that it sometimes becomes a feeding frenzy. One guy says something that the next guy takes exception to, and everyone else piles on. Really silly and a waste of time. This particular guy didn’t really bother me as he seems to be one of those feeding frenzy types…doesn’t really care about the subject matter, but just trying to get in the wittiest (he thinks) comment to get some laughs from his friends. And actually, he did get one laugh…no accountin’ for taste.
Twitter: chrissymarie321
Hi Holly, one of the reason I never log onto blog catalog any more is becuase I got sick of people being aggresive towards other opinions. There were times where I became appalled by other people’s behaviour and it seemed that no-one was controlling it (or not very well) so I voted with my keyboard.
He clearly wasn’t the brightest young man was he? Thanfully, your friends son showed a little more intelligence.
However, vitriolic people cause no end of mayhem on the internet. Talk to any parent and so many youngsters are being bullied online. He should have been reported and I would advise anyone who experiences this sort of unpleasant thing to do the same. Otherwise, they too could end up on BC shouting at some poor person, evangalistic tirades in the name of God or some other wonderful elevated platform! Rather good that your provided PM with some inspiration ;-)
Chrissy´s last blog post ..Shropshire Newly Emerged Butterflies
Hi Chrissy. Geesh…I haven’t interacted on BC for so long, but I remember it could get kinda touchy there. Those were the discussions I definitely stayed out of.
I think I summed up my feelings up there in PM’s comment pretty well. I think if people wanna cut on each other and the feelings are mutual, fine, but bullying is something else. Still, I should be able to go anywhere I want on the net and comment without being attacked. I’m convinced the attackers are just looking for validation from like-minded folks. Still, ugh.
I’m glad I could inspire PM…that’s usually Lucy’s doin’!
Good of your young friend to erase this nonsense off his facebook page, as I’m sure it will be soon be erased from your memory. I see a lot of this behavior on the BC discussion board, where I either treat it lightly or ignore it. Some people think they’re being witty or clever when they’re just being self-righteous or obnoxious. But I figure that’s their problem, not mine.
nothingprofound´s last blog post ..
Hi nothingprofound, and I agree with all you’ve said there. It would’ve bothered me if he were addressing the article AND being nasty, but I really don’t think he even read it. His only interest was being funny. Major FAIL.
Twitter: Hugzbe4ugo
I think FB needs to change their ” comment” choices. Often someone will post something where “like” is not exactly the appropriate reaction and yet we may be supportive of the content.
That’s a great photo to go with your post.
Grace´s last blog post ..Furnace in, landscaper out
I know what you mean, Grace. If you only see “oil spill” + “like” yeah, you’re likely to make assumptions there. If this clown had read the article, he would’ve realized that it was liar-liar-pants-on-fire story aimed at BP, and what’s not to like about that? Okay, I guess I’m makin’ my own assumptions here, but you catch my drift.
Yeah, maybe something like “agree” might be useful on FB…don’t know.
And thanks on the pic…it came in handy!
Twitter: craftybird
Ach, it’s soooo silly and pointless isn’t it? When I very first dipped my toe into the online world (on a long departed blog) I was astonished at how incredibly petty and mean people were capable of being. I’m really glad your friend took charge and made it clear that that crap is not appropriate, it makes all the difference when someone is prepared to do that. No-one should have to worry about expressing an opinion.
Chrissy made a good point about Blogcatlog’s discussion boards, I used to lurk there and stare goggle eyed at the spats, pettyness and weird cliquey in jokes and log straight back out again… I don’t go online to hang out in a bear pit. But I think people get locked into making the cheap obvious joke cause it makes them feel clever and gets a reaction one way or another, and then they take that same gladiatorial attitude to places where it really is innapropriate, like a friend’s Facebook profile.. good thing your friend was on the ball and nipped it all in the bud.
Bird´s last blog post ..Brilliant Aether & Always Coming Home
Hi Bird…yes, it is silly and pointless. Period. And I thought I had discovered all the major wastes of time! These rude sorts have me beat.
Like I wrote to Chrissy, I haven’t interacted on BC in ages. There are some very witty folks on BC, whose harmless back n’ forth I enjoy reading sometimes, but when discussions turn mean and it’s obvious that some just want to fight instead of address the issues, it’s not fun anymore.
And, yeah, I’m glad he took action, too.
Just wanna make sure you know I delete all the mean nasty attacks on you people make on my Facebook page, too…as well as the ones on my blog..
Seriously, attacking strangers seems to be many people’s reason for being on the internet. Then, like you and Chrissy up there, I quit going to BC quite some time ago since some of the thing’s people posted there made me so pissed off I had trouble not being mean and abusive myself…
YogaforCynics´s last blog post ..Dreaming…………………
Well then, drjay, my thanks go out to you as well as the kid. Although it would be nice if I could at least have the opportunity to shoot back with my own lame stuff…on second thought, jus’ keep deletin’… .
I remember seeing a few of your comebacks to some very deserving folks on BC…what a riot! Too bad the idiocy drove ya away. And I can’t imagine you being mean and abusive…but I can imagine you sitting there laughing now. :o)
By the way, the back n’ forth about dropped FB friends on your page was hilarious!
I have a facebook account only because everyone I know has one. But to be honest I hate it. I don’t see the point to it most of the time. Jerks like that one could be one of the reasons.
ann´s last blog post ..Giveaway Winner
Hi ann. I seem to be more social online than in real life, even with people I know. How weird is that? But yeah, I can see jerks keepin’ one away. And if you keep up with friends in real life, there’s probably no need for FB.
Ah the interwebs, where idiots are free to spew garbage as unfettered as the Deepwater Horizon disaster…ironically. :(
Lana´s last blog post ..New Painting
Ha! Exactly, Lana. And that was a pretty funny comment there! :o)
Twitter: aculifter
Very well put. As a paid jackarse who likes my job, I am oft want to interject humor into turbid rambles of ineptitude. I do not leap on strangers, nor do I EVER hesitate to give a youngster “some home trainin’ ” on conversing, and basically how to not take so many things literally or personally. If it happens on a friend’s page, I publicly apologize for ‘hijacking’ their page, and usually end up with the little shite as a friend who learns the importance of good humor, and an older friend who accepts them unconditionally. I then am able to see their posts change to much more positive, and often hilarious, understandings of like mind. If we can’t agree to disagree, I loves me some ‘hide’ and ‘remove’ LOL thanks again for the post.
Iona Traylor´s last blog post ..A nice little country cottage